Walking Backwards
by Anomaly-Anomaly
Summary: Story is still up purely because I need to beta.
1. Closed Chapter

_Why is she taking so long,_ I tapped my foot impatiently. Alice ran out of the door and dived into the backseat.

"Gosh Bella," She laughed. "No need to freak, we'll be there on time."

Emmett let out a whoop. "Score one for Alice, will Bella ever catch up?"

Rosalie smacked him on the back of the head.

Jasper coughed, obviously hiding a stray giggle.

I sighed, sometimes they were so unoriginal.

I floored it and we sped out of the drive.

--

As I parked the Volvo minutes later Alice began to bounce in her seat clapping her hands furiously and smiling her pixie heart out.

"Jasper, tell your wife to shut up if she wants to live till tonight," I peeked at her in the rearview mirror. She was grinning ear to ear.

"You forget, my dear sister, that I am already dead." She giggled.

Emmett laughed. "She's got a point you know."

I groaned in desperation.

"But Bella," She said, suddenly growing serious. "Watch yourself; you never know what will hit you."

I turned to stare at her, confusion written across my perfected features.

"What do you…?" I started, and then rolled my eyes.

She started to sing.

_Step one, you say we need to talk. He walks you say sit down it's just a talk. He stares politely back at you, you stare politely right on through._

I growled. "_Alice_."

She smiled sadly. "I'm sorry Bella; it's for your own good."

I growled and flew out of car. I shoved the door shut and the Volvo's frame shook.

"Damn it," I cursed.

I stormed through the rain, the crystal drops in my hair sparkling like my skin in the sun.

_Oh, here comes Cullen,_ I heard Mike's thoughts. _Wow, poor thing. She seems angry, maybe she'd like a little of me to make her feel better._

I gagged, that foul Mike Newton's thoughts were revolting. I pitied the girl who would ever love him.

I was interrupted by a wave of bodies rushing in out of the cold wet weather. I quietly slid to an empty corner and waited as the rest of my family filed in behind them.

My eyes slid from person to person and then caught a glimpse of a tall boy with a shock of bronze hair that was swept back in a casual elegance.

My eyebrows creased slightly. So few newcomers came to this small town anymore and it was always utter chaos for the opposite sex, looking to snatch them up before they managed to find someone else.

This person was something different though. His eyes were a delicate shade of green, and they seemed to lead to his soul.

But I only got a glimpse and soon brushed all thought off the bronze haired boy and his strange eyes.

--

I whipped through the first hours, gym with Emmett, English, Spanish with Alice and Trig. At lunch I met up with my family at our usual spot.

I was overwhelmed at once by the thoughts of the bronze haired boy.

"_Have you seen him?"_ Jessica was asking Lauren.

"_Yeah," _She sighed dramatically. "_I wonder if he'll say yes if I ask him to the dance."_

Jessica's insides stormed. _He's mine!_ But she didn't voice this opinion. Still, I would have liked to see Lauren's face if she had.

_Edward._

_Strange_, I thought. There had been a couple Edward's in my time.

Edward sat quietly by Mike's side. I saw him sneak a glance in my direction.

"_Who are they?"_ I heard his voice through Mike's mind, but when I tried to focus on his my 'hearing' was deaf.

My eyebrows creased.

"What's the matter, Bella?" Alice asked.

"I'm… not really sure," I said slowly. "I can't seem to get a grasp on that boy's –Edward's- mind…" I trailed off.

"I'm sure it's just a minor fluke," She reassured me. "It will probably pass."

But for some reason I didn't seem to believe her.

--

My next class was Biology and I wasn't really looking forward to it. I'd gotten a degree in Botany _and_ Zoology a couple years back and the class was insanely simple.

I made my way to my seat and scattered my books onto the empty desk to the left of mine. I sank further into my chair, preparing myself for the torturous long hour and a half ahead of me.

Then the new boy walked through the door. He stumbled to the front of the room and handed Mr. Banner a pass.

"Sorry…" I heard him mumble.

"It's okay," I heard Mr. Banner tell him. "Go have a seat by Isabella." He pointed to me.

I quickly piled my books together and set them down on the floor by my feet.

Just as he moved into the stream of air pouring out of the furnace his scent hit me full force.

I froze, my venom glands filling in an instant my muscles rippling up my arms. Then I caught a glimpse of myself in his luminous eyes.

I was tensed, my face contorted in an antagonistic stare. I saw his expression change to confusion and a rush of blood flushed his pale cheeks. I winced.

_Oh god, oh god no. Not me_. A million options formed in my mind. I saw pictures of my fangs ripping into his neck, drinking the warm blood that at this very instant was flowing through his veins.

I grabbed the side of my desk harshly, sliding to the extreme edge of my seat. I shut my eyes willing the scent to lessen. But it didn't and I slowly peeked out through my lashes. He was staring at me, a hurt expression evident on his brow.

"I-I'm sorry," I whispered. I didn't think he heard me.

I concentrated as hard as I could on Mr. Banner's lecture, it was on cellular anatomy. Something so simple a child could do it. Of course, that was what these humans were to me, children.

I winced again and pressed the palm of my hand to my nose. I stopped breathing.

It was the longest hour and a half of my long, endless life, and when the bell finally rang signaling the end of class I jumped out of my seat and almost ran out of the classroom.

--

When I was outside I sank to the ground rubbing my temple with my fingers.

_Why was he here?_ My thoughts were raging, almost incompetent in their speed. _When I had finally found a home, finally found a place where I could come out in the day, finally been happy. Why? Why? Why?_

I felt the anger rage through my chest, and if I could, I would have cried.

I took a shaky breath. I just had to think it thorough and everything would be okay.

When I was finally calm I made my way to my car. I drove to the maximum speed my Volvo could manage and skidded to a halt at the front of the hospital. I rushed through the push doors and waited impatiently as the desk attendant shuffled through some files.

_That must be Doctor Carlisle Cullen's daughter. She's quite a sight, looks kind of hassled though._

I coughed.

"Excuse me?" I purred. "I need to speak with my father, Dr. Cullen."

"Of course dear, he's in surgery right now, but I'll call as soon as he's done."

"Thank you."

--

I wandered over to the waiting area and sat down on the large plush sofa. I couldn't sit still for long though, and I was on my feet again. Pacing as fast as my human façade would allow.

When Carlisle arrived a half-hour later he knew at once that something was wrong. He rushed to my side, his thoughts racing.

"Bella, what's the matter? You look upset." His forehead creased in worry.

"I'm having issues with… this boy…"

At these words a smile spread across his face.

_This is so wonderful,_ he thought_. Wait till Esme finds out, she'll be so happy our Bella's never going to be alone again!_

"Carlisle, _dad_, no. It's not that kind of problem."

His smile melted.

"Then what kind problem is it?" He asked.

I took a deep breath and then I let all the words flow out of me in a stream of sentences so fast, no human would even comprehend a word.

"I can't hear his thoughts, and he reacts differently than the others. Like one of us. And he smells _so_ good. I don't even understand it. Something like this has never happened to me before. And I'm scared, Dad, I don't want to leave, but I don't think I can last another day with him in the same school, much less the same classroom. Today in Biology I almost lost it, I almost killed him. I almost killed _all _of them."

I took another dragging breath, my frame shaking with tearless sobs.

Carlisle held me to his chest, stroking my hair softly.

"But you didn't, and I am so proud of you," he said reassuringly. "You don't have to leave, just talk to the others, I'm sure they'll help. We all love you, Bella, and it would hurt us very much if you went away."

"Thank you," I whispered softly, I was sure he heard me.

--

I met the others in the parking lot, just as the final bell rang. Everyone was strangely quiet as they loaded into the car, and as I picked their minds I found out why. Alice.

"Bella," She whispered.

I whirled around to face her.

"What Alice? You didn't see me massacring a whole classroom? You didn't think to warn me? I almost killed _everyone._ I was a hairs-breadth away from it."

"I-I'm sorry," She put her head in her hands. I instantly felt remorseful for yelling at her. "I didn't see it until it was too late." She moaned. "A-and then, then I saw…"

Millions of images flashed through my mind. Edward. Edward's arms wrapped around my waist, taking my lips in his, kissing me hard; him on my back, running as fast as I could. And the final image, I was on the ground, laying there, arms spread. The sun was high over me my skin sparkling like diamonds; Edwards's fingers stroking over my face and finally coming to my lips. He leaned down…

"No," My harsh tone broke the silence. "That's not possible. "I _can't_ love him, Alice. We're from different worlds. I almost _killed_ him, I _would_ have killed him! I wanted to." My hands balled up into fists.

I saw Jasper's hand come up behind me and felt a wave of calm wash over me. I wrenched myself out of his grasp and flung the door open.

"Not helping, Jasper." I growled as I flung the keys to Alice. I stormed away from them, and in my mind I could hear their reeling thoughts.

--

I had no clue where to go so I made my way to a close neighborhood. I recognized Mike's house from a couple of kids who had been to parties there. I passed the police station, where Edward's dad –Charlie- worked. I knew where Charlie lived, and that was bad. It meant I could find Edward.

I darted into the woods and ran, as fast and hard as possible. When I emerged I saw a red truck parked along the side of the road. I was curious; I hadn't seen a red truck like this in Forks before. I walked up to it and sniffed it tenderly.

It was Edward's. But where was he?

I sniffed again; his scent was strongest near the woods. I bent over, ducking around the truck and into the tree cover.

His scent made my mouth water and I clenched my fists.

"You can do this, Bella," I muttered. "Just take a look, no need to rip his head off."

I grabbed a branch above my head and flipped myself into the foliage of the tree and peered out through the leaves.

Edward was sitting on the moist soil, his jacket spread under him. It was an unusually warm day and he had on a t-shirt. His hair fell messily into his eyes as he bent over an old, worn copy of Wuthering Heights.

I watched as one by one, as small rays of light pierced the dark wood.

_Bella, your skin._

I whipped my head around and my eyes caught on my arm, it was shimmering, like millions of crystals were embedded in the flesh. I breathed in quickly.

I watched in alarm as Edward's head turned toward my quiet gasp.

I flung myself into another tree, dropped to the ground and ran like fire.

I was trapped in the woods till darkness fell and as I crouched in the shade of a sycamore I thought, long and hard.

I had just proved strong enough to be near Edward for a length of time, even if I didn't like to put his life in danger to do it.

I hunted after that, drinking so much then I felt bloated and stuffed. When the sun finally fell, I made my way down the twisty path to the Cullen home.

The pale white house was nestled in a garden of ferns that Esme kept neatly trimmed.

I didn't even bother to use the front door, although I missed my family, I didn't feel ready to see them yet. Instead, I scaled the wall and slid through my open window. Alice was waiting for me.

"Bella," She said, sliding her tiny arms around my waist. "You and Edward will be okay, you _can_ love him, there's nothing stopping you."

I took a step away, my voice rising. "Yes, there is. Bloodlust. His blood, Alice, it sings to me, calling me to take it. I can barely control myself when I'm around him. How am I supposed to concentrate on anything other than not killing him?" I was shrieking, my voice climbing two octaves.

"Bella," Carlisle spoke from the doorway. "You are strong enough, you can do it."

I whirled around to face him.

"I _can't, _Carlisle." I sank to my knees, my hands clutching my face. "Even if I could," my voice was less than a whisper. "He'd never love me. I'm a killer. I've broken everything I've ever cared for."

--

The night was hard. I paced quickly, letting out a stream of profanities as Alice sat patiently on my sofa.

"Please, Bella," Alice begged. "Just give it a chance. I've seen it. You'll be okay. It's what you should want."

I closed my eyes.

"I don't know what I want, Alice"

--

I went to school the next day. I was nervous, my breaths coming in quick gasps. Jasper sent a wave of calm and I had never been more grateful.

The beginning of the day was okay and as I made my way to lunch I met up with Rose.

"Have you seen him yet?" She asked.

"No."

"Good."

I smiled.

"I've never agreed more."

When we were sitting at out usual table Emmett piped up.

"Edward's staring at you."

I swore.

Emmett cracked up, "Watch your language Bells, you never know if a teacher's near."

I stared at him incredulously. "Yes I do." I tapped the side of my temple.

The whole table cracked up.

But inside, my emotions fluttered.

--

I walked as slowly as possible to Biology and when I came to the door, I peeked through the small window. He was already there.

I took a deep breath and walked into Hell.

"Hello," I said quietly.

He turned to stare at me, surprise written clearly on his face.

"Hi..?"

"My name's Bella Cullen."

He looked down at his hands.

"I'm… Edward Mason."

I smiled timidly and he blushed.

That was it, I was out of air. I hesitantly took another breath. Bad idea. His scent rushed into my lungs.

My muscles tensed and I slid to the edge of my chair.

_Why you? _I thought. _Why Edward? Why is it you?_

He touched my arm. I could feel his pulse, his blood pumping through his veins.

"Is something wrong?" He asked.

"Yes, Edward," I told him. "Something is very wrong."

He looked at me as if I should continue but I didn't speak more. He turned to the front, his lip pinched between his teeth.

When the bell finally rang I sat still, willing myself control. I watched Edward rise, and stumble up the isle. His toe caught on a chair and he fell, his books spilling out of his hands and landing in a crumpled heap.

I got up and walked out the door, leaving him lying on the ground.

--

I didn't go to my next class; instead I waited outside in the Volvo for Alice. I knew she would come.

"Hey, Bella," I heard Alice pull open the door and climb in.

"I need your help," I said gravely. "I've decided."


	2. Discourage

**And with absolutely no ado at all, I present the second installment of Walking Backwards…**

Alice planned it all, down to the last second. And to be honest, I was grateful to her. I didn't want to play it by ear but still, her nosy attitude was getting on my nerves.

I paced around the room, counting everything that came into view.

"Thanks," I whispered.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked.

I nodded.

Alice took my hand. "We have to go, Bella."

Jasper gave me a quick half-hug and went to embrace his petite wife. I couldn't help but cringe. I turned away from them, but I couldn't block out their thoughts completely.I wasn't jealous but I did feel a pang longing, wishing for what Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme all had.

--

The plan was to sneak in through Edward's window after midnight. The idea petrified me but having Alice there was reassuring. I wasn't at all sure that I could do this, but I was positive that I couldn't leave Forks. I couldn't abandon my family like that. It would be too cruel.

_Flash,_ My mouth against his neck, kissing up his throat. "_I love you…"_ His head resting on my chest, as if to hear my heart beat…

"Please?"

I drew in a deep breath, and although it wasn't needed it helped just a bit to calm my nerves.

"Let's get this over with." My lips barley moved over the words.

Alice scaled the tree before me, creaking open the window. I flinched and the sound in my ears was a scream.

_You can do this; I know you can,_ Alice tried to comfort me.

I didn't respond, just took one last gulp of air before I grasped the first branch of the old maple.

I had been right in my guessing, this _was_ Edward's room. His CD player sat on his desk; dozens of albums scattered around it, the blue collared shirt he had worn the day before lay over the back of the oak chair in front of his computer. My eyes scanned over his possessions and I felt kind of bad, intruding on his privacy like that but it needed to be done, I had to know if I could do this. I let my eyes wander last to Edward himself.

Edward was lying on his side, wrapped in a light off-white sheet. His mouth was closed, his beautiful bronze hair falling over his face. I felt myself drawn to him, like two magnets. The urge to kiss him was almost too much. And it shook me a bit.

I stood there, watching him intently, completely resolved in my newest realization, the realization that a boy who's blood was better than the rest, a boy that probably hated me, a boy that I'd almost killed, that that boy was the one I wanted.

"_No."_ At first I thought the boy had woken up. My shoulders tensed for impact, although there was zero possibility that a fragile human like him could ever hurt me. At least not physically.

"_Bella…"_ he groaned. I crept over to his bedside.

"What, Edward?" I breathed.

He sighed and burrowed his face in the pillow.

I watched him longer, kneeling beside his bed, my position never changing. His pupils flickered under his eyelids. I was dying to know what was whispering through his mind. My teeth ground together in annoyance, my eyes squinting. Finally I relaxed, letting myself stand.

"_Goodnight, Edward, sleep well." _And the last of my breath left me.

Alice touched my shoulder. _We should go._

I closed my eyes as I turned my back on the boy.

--

"What happened?" Emmett pestered the moment I was through the door, grinning. "Did you make out with him?"

If he was killable I probably would have murdered him a long time ago.

"No, Emmett," I sighed. "He was asleep the whole time, I just watched him."

Emmett stomped his foot. "You are so boring," he wined.

"And you are such a baby." Rosalie saved me and I flashed a gracious smile in her direction.

Rose walked over to Emmett's side and stole a kiss, smirking into her lover's lips.

Esme and Carlisle were grinning stupidly at me.

_I _knew what they were thinking.

"What?" I demanded, trotting over to the stairs. "I glance at a boy once and you two get all googely eyed at me."

They looked hurt and I started apologizing in an instant. "Esme, Carlisle, I-"

Carlisle held up a hand, stopping my protests. "Bella, it was our fault; we got ahead of ourselves."

I blinked.

"Uh-" I stuttered.

Esme took me into her arms. "We love you, Honey, and we just want you to be happy. If us leaving you alone means that we're fine with it."

I closed my eyes and buried my head into her neck. "I love you too, mom, dad. I don't know what I'd do without you." My eyes burned. I may not have husband but I had my mother and father and, for now, that was all I needed.

--

Of course, Alice being Alice had a second plan. And knowing her, it would be something as completely insane as this.

"Please," She begged as we weaved through the hordes of students flooding the halls. "For me?"

Okay that was definitely against the rules. As we all knew, Alice's best weapon was her puppy dog face.

"Fine, I'll do it." I crumpled under her gaze. I was a total wimp of a vampire.

One thing I'd learned in my years with Alice was that she always won. Over Carlisle, over Esme, over Rosalie, over Emmett, over Jasper, and over me. It was just something you had to learn, to always get on her side first. Because you can't ever win against a physic pixie, yep, that's the truth.

I looked down, my mood thundering dangerously, a bold of lightning crashing down through my bones. The clouds the gathered behind my eyes and rained down my throat. My fists clenched at my sides.

Alice patted my arm. "It's okay." She whispered. But in her thoughts she said

_He loves you._

I glared at her.

"You don't know that."

She smirked at me, her little feet flying away down the hall.

So many thoughts whirled around me, their currents pressing into my head until bursting.

_I have three papers to write tonight, I've always been such a procrastinator…_

_Me pregunto cóm__o Rodrigo está detrás en México, yo espero que él esté bien-_

_What is wrong with him? How could that idiot dump me? Me!? That girl is a lousy…_

The constant noise, buzzing, trilling; it could drive anyone mad. The voice on the outside of my ears the thoughts on the inside in my head, the thousands of blood types pressing into my nose it was all overwhelming. All extremely irritating.

I slid into the girl's bathroom, shutting the stall and locking it. If I could cry I would. The pressure was over whelming me. Alice kept pushing on me to make a move on Edward and I was too much of a wimp to say no. But I could never let Alice see me like this, a vampire acting so much like a human. I got up and walked out of the bathroom stall. I went out to find Edward and tell him what I had to tell him. The truth.

--

My insides were shaking as the cafeteria came into view, the students stuffing their mouths with the hell-food they needed to sustain themselves. Edward was sitting with Newton and that Jessica Stanley girl, my insides crawled at the sight. As I walked towards them, Newton and Jessica both turned towards me. Newton gave me a look of pure adoration. If I could have thrown up I would have. Jessica gave me a death glare. If looks could kill, I'd be dead ten times over.  
"Edward," I called. "Can I talk to you about something?"  
His eyes widened. "Sure," he replied simply. He got up and walked over to me. I could smell his breath, his heart beating through his veins; I could feel my teeth ripping through the tendons and muscles of the neck finally to split open the- wait? What was I thinking? Edward wasn't food, _god that sounded like some Disney movie or something. _I sighed, cursing myself inwardly.

I chewed on my lip as he took is seat across from me. Our feet touching under the table, his innocent emerald eyes boring into mine, I froze.

He was blushing, a trait I'd lost along with my humanity.

"So…" He started, looking down at his hands. "What did you want to tell me?"

I opened my mouth and then closed it. "Um…" I finally said. "I-I did have something to tell you."

"Ah... what was it?" he asked, still looking away.

I noticed that neither of us looked at each other as we spoke. He was so beautiful, his alabaster skin almost as luminescent as one of ours, his eyes such a deep green. I just wanted to listen to his voice and never let it stop.  
"Well...I wanted to ask you if you wanted to hang this weekend." I blurted, knowing that Alice would kill me if she heard this. Which, I sighed, she probably did.  
"Sure," He sounded too excited.

"This isn't a good idea," I warned him. "You shouldn't want to be near me. It's not safe."

Edward finally looked at me in the eyes. "I feel very safe with you."

I stood up. "Okay, I'll meet you at your house on Saturday at noon. Bye."

I could feel Edward's eyes trailing after me.

"Good… bye…" He muttered.

--

"Alice," I growled. "I am not wearing this!" My voice broke through two octaves. "I look like a- a…" I trailed off in horror. The shirt didn't even reach down to my belly button and the jeans... I flinched.

"Come on, Bella, for me?" Alice fluttered her eyelids.

"No." I put my foot down. "I am _wearing what I want to this date!" _

Alice's lip quivered. "Bella?" She squeaked.

"No."

"Bella?"

"No."

"For me?"

I pressed my fist into my forehead. "I promise you, Alice, I won't wear something _that_ bad. I just don't want to look like a hooker."

The door creaked open. "You're going to be late if you keep this up," Rosalie purred from behind me.

I sighed. "Thanks Rose. Now Alice, leave." I opened my walk-in closet –courtesy of You-Know-Who- and stared at the walls of clothing. Finally picking out a white camisole and a beige cardigan from the shelves I added a light pair of blue-jeans and I skipped merrily along down to my car. And I froze in horror. My beautiful Volvo was bright pink. I slammed my fist into the drywall, leaving a huge gaping, fist-sized hole. I'd have to make it up to Esme later.

"Damn you, Alice." I cursed.

I ran back inside to grab the keys to my Aston Martin Vanquish. As I got the motor running I cringed. I didn't want Edward thinking I was spoiled rich, despite the fact that the latter was true. Cash wasn't important when you had a daddy-doctor who could work twenty-four seven and a physic sister who could predict the rise and fall of the stock market.

When I got to his house –which took absolutely no time- I parked around the corner. Waiting. 11:58, 11:59… finally 12:00. I inched the car around the corner and into his driveway. I could hear him in his house, slipping on a pair of shoes and taking one last look in the mirror.

_Please, _I prayed to god knows who. _Please let me not screw this up. _I took a deep breath.

"Edward, here I come." I pushed open the car door and slid out of my seat. Each step towards his door was terrifying, each step closer and closer to my demise. My hand hovered over the doorbell for exactly five seconds before I gathered the courage to press the small, rectangular button.

The door creaked open.  
"Hello," My voice seemed too inhuman; although that made sense it annoyed me.

"Hey," Edward leaned his head against the door frame. I smiled shyly, causing a blush spread across his pale cheeks.

I motioned to the door. "Can I come in?"

He jumped and blushed even redder, "sure," he muttered.

He led me to the kitchen, pulling out a chair for me to sit. My eyebrows creased a bit at this, I thought the trait of pulling out a lady's chair had stopped years ago. He turned to counter.

"Water?"

"Hmn?"

"Do you want some water?"

I shrugged and then realized he wasn't looking at me. "Sure, if it's not a bother."

Edward opened the refrigerator. A burst of cold air rushed out and I felt him shiver. He quickly grabbed the pitcher of water and poured it into two plain glasses. He carried them back to the table, setting one in front of me and taking one for himself.

He took a sip. "Where are we going today?" I looked around the kitchen, spotting the flaws in the table where a glass had been set, and the nicks where a knife once hit.

I choked down a swallow. "I have a special place in mind."

"Where may that be?" He put the glass to his lips but didn't drink.

"A little place only I know." I looked up at him through my impossibly long lashes. He blushed. I chuckled.

Suddenly I was in front of him, my thumb under his chin, tilting his head up to mine. "You're lovely when you do that," I purred. His heartbeat sped up. I ran the back of my hand along his cheekbone. Then, "No, this is wrong."

"W-what?" He stuttered.

I closed my eyes and looked down, sinking away from him. "It's dangerous for me to fall in love with you."

Then it was he who touched my face, bringing my eyes to his. "You can fall in love with whoever you want, even if it's not me." He whispered.

I stood up suddenly, causing him to fall back into his chair. "We should go. We'll need enough time if we're going to get home before dark."

"Yeah," He stood, looking more than slightly distracted.

He followed me to my car gaping at the luxurious Aston Martin Vanquish before him. "Is this yours?" He asked.

I shrugged. "Yeah, Alice trashed my Volvo so I was kind of left with no choice."

He opened the driver seat for me and I climbed in. "Thank you," I muttered.

Edward looked down at his hands. "You're welcome."

I started driving, as soon as we were out of town realization hit me. Trapped in that small little car, his scent washing, pumping over me, he was physically in danger. I took a deep breath. "Oh, God," I choked.

I slammed my foot into the brake and clenched both of my hands over my nose.

"Are you alright?" Edward's voice was frantic.

"I-I-" I stuttered. I threw the car door open. "I think I'm going to puke," I lied, jumping out of the car and running to the side of road. Dry heaves racked my body.

"Shh, it'll be okay." I felt one of Edward's hands pulling back my hair, the other on my back.

After my body stopped heaving I sat back into his arms. Relishing in the warmth

"Are you alright?" He asked.

"Yeah," I lied. The truth was that I was more confused than anything. My body had automatically rejected the scent of his blood; I had been fighting so hard…

I wiped my mouth on my hand.

"L-let's go," I stuttered.

He wouldn't let me drive the car, even though I insisted I was fine. I watched his face as he clutched the wheel, his knuckles turning white, the open window blowing in his face.

"Are you okay?" I finally asked.

"No." He grunted. Then, "You scared me."

I looked at him sadly, his beautiful human hair blowing out behind him, his beautiful human eyes staring straight at the road. Then I looked again. The motor purred under his grasp, I wanted to touch him so bad it hurt.

"_Edward,"_ I whispered.

He glanced at me with those deep emerald eyes. "What?" He turned back to the road again, the car speeding up a little.

I twisted my marble hands together. "I'm not who you think." I muttered to myself. "I can't love you; if I ever bit you…"

Edward's posture stiffened, his back going ridged, his abdominal muscles clenching. "What did you say?" He asked through his teeth.

My eyes widened. "I didn't say anything."

His gaze flickered to me and then back to the road.

Silence.

"You lie."

I wished my body had some kind of reaction. Instead I looked down into the dark leather seats, searching for some pattern to the crazy scribbles that ran down the sides.

"You said bite."

I looked into his eyes, letting some of the monster sneak through. "I said nothing."

I saw the recognition in his face, of the creature I was. Creature. Not human. I think somewhere in his mind he knew the truth, but these lies I've weaved worked. At least for now. I wondered when they were going to break.

He turned back to the road again. "Where are we going?" He asked through his teeth.

I growled in the back of my throat. "To Port Angeles, dinner, is there a certain place you like?"

He shrugged. "Not particularly."

I turned away from him, looking out through the glass at the world rushing by. We were slowing down. My eyebrows creased. "What are you doing?"

Edward pulled the car to the side of the road.

"Okay, give."

I froze.

"What are you?"

The question hung in the air on a thread.

14


End file.
